By Kimberley Jones
At Christmas time many of us are spending a lot of time, energy & money on other people. It is a special time of year when hearts open but it can also be exhausting.
I hope I can help you retain some balance at this often hectic time of year by asking:
What about You?
Have you thought about what you really want?
What you need? How you feel?
What can you do or plan for yourself that would feel like an indulgent treat?
Of course this applies to many people all through the year, not just at Christmas.
These are especially important questions if you are someone who tends to put everyone else first. You know who you are. Doing all you can to make others happy only stopping to do something for yourself if you happen to have some time, energy or money left over. If you are someone who feels guilty about receiving or about spending time, energy & money on yourself try the following exercise:
Look at yourself in the mirror, take it gently, it may be hard to look into your own eyes at first. Remember to breathe, deeply & gently into your belly, letting go of the out-breath with no forcing or holding, just dropping it to the floor like a balloon.
Now say to yourself in the mirror:
"I..... (your name) ......now give to myself at least as much as I give to others."
Say this a few times until you start to believe it, let the words drop into your body, try to feel & mean what you are saying. You may get resistant thoughts popping up, just notice them & let them pass through; these are just your old beliefs showing up on their way out. These old beliefs feel challenged by the new one you are feeding into your consciousness.
The amazing thing about being a human being however is that you can decide what to think & then think it, so don't be put off by these old thoughts when they pop up, just persevere with the new one until it sticks.
If you do not give to yourself at least as much as you give out to others you will always be in a state of emotional, energetic or financial debt. It is essential for your health & happiness to regularly fill your own love tanks. To give from a healthy, joyful place your own love tanks need to be filled to overflowing. It is what flows over the sides of your love tanks that you give to others, not your essential core reserves.
As you learn to love yourself more & to respect your energy reserves so this gentle overflowing trickle of energy & love becomes a powerful force like that of a waterfall, growing stronger & stronger.
So what can you do this Christmas & New Year to add something to your own love tanks?
Here are some ideas:
Buy yourself a present!
Go to bed early, get snuggly & warm & read a good book.
Switch the phones off & have a long soak in a candle-lit bath.
Say 'No' to demands on your time & energy.
Say 'Yes' when someone offers to do something to help you.
Give yourself a loving & gentle massage after your bath with warm oils.
Press the pause button on your day, make yourself a cup of tea & put your feet up.
Think & say loving things about yourself.
Ask your friends what they love about you.
Be gentle with yourself mentally & physically.
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